Box Of Feelings: Assignment #3

Though we may not want it or see it happen, everything changes. Very often, we need our feelings to change in order for us to move on.

It is thus time to learn how to cope with regret through detachment.

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Assignment #3: Go around your house or any place you keep your secret treasures and memorabilia. Collect all of the small items that remind you of something or someone you have loved but had to let go. It may not have been an easy choice and it must have  left marks on you (because you still keep the stuff).

Once you  have it all, place them tidely on the floor and lay shirtless (and bra-less, if you’re a girl) on top of them. Lie quietly over them, and think about why this is or should be part of your past. Stay there as long as you need, but it must be long enough to cause you a slight discomfort and leave physical marks. It will eventually wear off.

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If you want to participate in the project, take a picture of your marked skin and/or of the objects you lied upon and send it to idealistico.wordpress@gmail.com.

A Mutation

The chemistry of feelings
Natural laws, emotional states
No matter how strong my will is
Changing without obliterating
What a challenging trial to make
Is my present my past remolded?
A lot is lost, a lot is taken
And everything is transformed
Again and again

Nothing is created from scratch

Volcanology

There are those who burst with their insanity
Spitting stupidity, vomiting vulgarity
Not I, for I can but implode with mine

When I learn to erupt so slowly
My whirlwinds will turn into lakes
Pools of discomfort, embers that cool
Shall give rise to what may come my way

Fright

Thoughts of being nothing without my expectations and dreams have been here, within
But I am me, with the insides out, a bit real, still me
What scares and threatens may as well liberate
Through anger and ache, from past to fate

Grip

The problem with yearning for something
Is that one day you might get it
Or leave it

Letting go of something can be just as painful
As holding on to something going wrong

Tailored

Whan can I keep?
What will you take back?
What’s left of me, when you do that?

I’m gonna throw up
I’m gonna throw up
I’m gonna throw up

***
He was tailor-made for me

Revealing

Perfection, any kind of perfection, always demands some kind of concealment.

*

*

Without something hiding itself, or remaining hidden, there is no perfection.

(Roberto Calasso, The Marriage of Cadmus and Harmony)

Blue

Baby, can you see through the tears?

I have loved Lana del Rey since the very first time I saw and heard her.

Sap

IF HOPE is to grow and blossom, it should take the form of a bush, not a tree
Its roots should be short and superficial, its leaves bendable and sweet
Its structure not stiff as a trunk, but with stems as flexible as the wind commands

So when it dies it won’t cause as much destruction
When it falls or is felled by the untamed
Pruned by the tearing of all conjunction

Anxiety

Sometimes,

Writing is not enough
Talking is not enough
Music is not enough
Silence is not enough
Friendship is not enough
Love is not enough
Lust is not enough
Fun is not enough
Exhaustion is not enough

And vicariousness is of great help

Persona

Sometimes contemplating something broken helps us reinvent ourselves.

The Turbulence

May one day my whimsical mind be mitigated,
When my anxious weakened thoughts are obliterated
Then giving way to the magic wonders of every day,
When with the life of others I shall never play

But then again, what is the mouth to say?

First person singular

There was something in the bass you gave me
I was losing all my self control
I can see that I was acting crazy

Didn’t I tell you, didn’t I tell, you didn’t I tell you?
Not to be so kind to me

I want to live in this melody.

Altogether

WRITING is dying and living and dying and dying and drawing and remaining.
To be strong and weak and strong and weak and obstinate and frail.
To allow, to permit, to allow, to allow, to allow to be able to let go.
Illusion, delusion: dreaming and daring and imagining and evading.

I need them all. All of them.

Outwards

Thinking tranquility cannot stop me from attempting to step out;
and novelty constantly drags me into untried territories:
its taste is truthfully fascinating,
albeit exhaustive

Pictures by Eeva Karhu