on holiday

In the next two weeks there shall be erratic posts due to international travelling.

I shall attempt to write on a regular basis but I don’t know the possibilities.

Many stories might come.

Picture by Daniel Gebhart de Koekkoek

 

At heart

These are my favorite things in the whole universe as we know it:

1. Men

2. Friends

3. Music

4. The Arts

5. Coffee

A handshake

Some days ago I went on a date with a guy I had barely spoken to before. When he said he loved Japanese food but then chose a scarcely interesting restaurant for the meeting, I felt it wouldn’t work out but I thought I’d give him a chance – I know I tend to dismiss people much too soon.

He looked quite nice, so that cheered me up. He seemed to like my appearance as well, and I suppose there was some sort of silent agreement on making an effort, at least for the sake of physical attraction.

As the evening went on and the talk started to unravel into confessions and stated opinions from his part, I grew quieter and quieter. I was paying close attention to the things he said, but the more he spoke the more I reckoned our views were too divergent – then I couldn’t bother to voice them.

So I turned into my timid self, smiley and attentive with that charming aura of shyness I was told I get, and my mind began to wander. I have never been able to understand why some people are so eager to express their views on relationships when they first meet someone. It feels like they are freezing all possibility at first sight, without allowing themselves to know how things could ever progress on their natural course. I was amazed and bored.

When he offered me a ride home I could sense his opinion on me differed from mine on him, and I was secretly hoping he had found me dull. He dropped me close to my street and I gave him a handshake and a wide smile simultaneously, as if I was trying to make up for the cold gesture. Instead of arranging a second date, I thanked him for the ride like it had been the grandest of favors.

I didn’t know what else to do.

 

2 I hate, 1 I love

I hate adults who love Harry Potter books/films;

I hate people who post photos of food on social networks;

I love social networks.

Seance

Finding a mind frame that might fit your life perfectly is faintly utopic.

Giving up the pursue is even more appalling.

I’ll keep on.

Lesson

Though dreams can be deceiving

Like faces are to hearts

They serve for sweet relieving

Words by Fiona Apple

Works by Alexander Joly, Jake Pauls; photo by Maurizio Fiorino

Official

Faller-in-love: an upcoming profession, a habit, a vice.

I can’t stop myself.

Joy

A beat can sometimes speak right to one’s soul: a true bliss.

When I first heard this, I knew I would love it:

And here’s an extra taste:

The retro guitars, the echoey vocals, the fake naivety – love, love, love.

Seapony is my new official feel-good act.

Alter

Slowing entering a world that isn’t mine.

So now I can almost say; instead of scared, I’m fascinated.

The impact of a single change is as strong as it is necessary.

New seas to be sailed, new expressions to be shown.

The magic of a soft distortion in a positive direction.

Detracted symbols, weakened fortresses.

Wisely twisting something that should be bent.

Between two selves.

All works by American artist Matthew Ronay

Motion

Letting go of old habits is a hard task.

Loving the new cannot be planned: it rimes with discovery.

One moves faster out of unexpected needs, immediate threats, hasty departures.

Novelty.

Am I repeating myself?

Mental soundtrack by The Horrors.

Danger

Inner worlds and day-dreams are so inviting and comfortable one might deliberately live one’s entire life in them.

But reality is a slap in the face, and the stronger the hit, the harder the need.

Collections of thoughts might get you so far, never much further. The path outwards is most commonly the most defying.

So glistening and glamorous dreaming can be. Deceiving but relieving; the relief of avoidance.

Break, erupt, discontinue, disclose, transgress,trespass.

Escape.

All works by Felix González-Torres

Wishful

If I were to encounter a magic being or object who/which would grant me three self-directed wishes (so as to avoid the temptation of saving the world), they would be:

1. To be  widely more sponteneous

2. To be far less judgemental

3. To have way thicker hair

A man does not live only of grand ideals.

Embracing universes

Ever since CDs stopped being relevant, there are only two things in the world I like to purchase: clothes & books.

With clothes I get to express my moods, manifest ideas and cause immediate reactions. With books I absorb others’ impressions and feelings through their creative view of the world, and respond mentally to them.

I’m an avid yet inconstant reader, and I tend to read several novels at the same time – besides all the other readings I regularly do.

Sometimes it can take months before I finish one piece of work. This may be due to my reluctance to part from an enticing or surprising narrative – I get too attached to these universes which eventually help me build my own.

There are five books between which I’m presently dividing my attention, all I can but highly recommend:

1. Sagarana, by Guimarães Rosa;

2. Le Marin de Gibraltar, by Marguerite Duras;

3. Todos los fuegos el fuego, by Julio Cortázar;

4. The Line of Beauty, by Allan Hollinghurst and

5. The Bell Jar, by Sylvia Plath.

All of these are remarkable in their own right, but I am absolutely fascinated by Sylvia Plath’s only published novel.

Sylvia Plath

It is so relieving to enter someone else’s life, sharing their impressions, views, loves and fears, it is like one gets a singular chance of reinterpreting one’s own reality.

Something I most earnestly ought to do.

Flower/Dusk

Whatever can be turned, will be turned; now or later, now and then

Around or upside down, perspectives bounce and change

If only we were to let things follow their course

Controlling impulses one cannot contain

The contention of control

Liberty

Freeing colors, constraining forms

Fighting fears: letting go